quick poll: who wants the angstiest of screenshots™ from a new todoroki family fic i’m working on?
warnings for endeavour’s shitty parenting, ofc
Warnings: child abuse, strong language

quick poll: who wants the angstiest of screenshots™ from a new todoroki family fic i’m working on?
warnings for endeavour’s shitty parenting, ofc
Warnings: child abuse, strong language

heads up, this post is tmi and contains explicit reference to abuse. i’m posting it here because i can’t say it anywhere else, but that doesn’t mean you have to read it. please stay safe.
i’m going to write this because i spent 20 years not being able to tell anyone, and i still feel like i never said anything, and never got out, and now i’m expected to just get over it and forget about it and sometimes i feel like i’m suffocating with it and i feel like someone took part of my voice away and i feel like i’ve got things tying up my thoughts and blocking out parts of my brain SO fuck that
here’s a list of things that i’m pretty sure happened to me growing up. (pretty sure because i remember them, but my parents have often told me i’m crazy, so hey. take that as you will.)
– hiding under the bed up until i was 16 to stay away from my parents. i learned to hide where the dresser was so they wouldn’t see me underneath
– trying to hold my bedroom shut whilst they tried to push it open, more times than i can count
– ran away, mostly between 12 and 15, more times than i can count
– dragged into and out of cars by my hair, normally getting hit before/after, often (over a dozen times at least)
– pushed over and onto the floor, more times than i can count
– various things thrown at me, though not normally things that would break: boxes and books and wooden stuff, not glass or china
– head slammed into walls/bedposts/ etc
– slapped so many times in a row i’d get dizzy
– lifted up off the floor by being grabbed by my arms hard enough to leave bruises, shaken
– generally just smacked whenever/wherever possible – thighs, arms, head etc
– grabbed by the front of my shirt/hair/shoved into things
– threatened with being killed, threatened with being ‘beaten within an inch of your life’ in private and in public places. told everyone i would ever meet would want to punch me eventually. cruising for a bruising, meant pretty literally
– locked out of the house. left on the side of the road in hong kong, derbyshire, italy, france.
– told to lie to family and friends about why i was upset after a fight
– twice, locked myself in rooms only for my parents to try and break through the doors with hammers. in both cases, on realising i couldn’t get out, got so scared i let them in
– threatened to burn all my stuff, threw my stuff in the bin, etc
– broke my school violin bow over my thigh and another against the wall, told to lie about it
– shouted at until i cried so much i threw up, made to clear it up, twice at least
– threatened with a knife
– threw a box of laundry powder at me, pushed onto a concrete floor, told my brother in a different city to call the police because of ‘what was going to happen’
– told not to flinch: pushed, slapped, knocked over if i did
– general shouting, screaming etc. swearing, calling me names, insisting i hated them and didn’t love them actively schemed to make their lives worse
– locked in rooms on holidays etc, told to stay quiet and do nothing until they came back, not told when they would, often waited for hours
– bumped by mum’s car on purpose when i tried to get in, left to wait outside the school, told if i wasn’t there they’d leave me there, waited for 4 and a half hours
i’m still not sure if i’m just being a dumb middle class white girl complaining about something that’s normal for most people, honestly. but it was father’s day and all this fucking todoroki stuff in bnha is stressing me out and i’m trying to write a fic to get rid of those feelings and i think it’s just making me feel worse and i can’t talk to anyone about it so
i’m writing it here. yeah. anyway it’s all fine now
Hey, thank you so much!!! Whump Fic Bingo from this post!
I was tempted to do a shipping one but then I had this idea and wanted to do it instead, I hope you don’t mind!!
Making excuses to linger because they don’t want to be alone
Warnings: references to Child Abuse
“Todoroki, whilst the last thing I want to do is discourage diligence in a student, you really don’t need to actually polish the classroom floor. We pay very competent staff to do that. And they use machines. Well, Himiko uses her quirk, but the rest of the staff use machines. And whilst I think it’s very…” Aizawa pauses, searching for the appropriate word with which to describe his latest wayward student’s antics, “admirable, that you have so much respect for your, uh, place of learning…This isn’t necessary. At all.”
Todoroki Shouto, whom Aizawa had found in his classroom forty-five minutes after the final bell of term had punched its cacophony throughout the campus, seems to be trying very hard not to look at him. Given Aizawa’s quirk and career, this is not an unusual experience for him. So he sighs, and he crosses his arms, and he leans against the doorframe. When Todoroki does speak, he does so quietly, with the kind of composure a poker player would kill for (and, in one horrific case of a face-stealing quirk user, actually did).
“I’m sorry, sir, I was just…” Todoroki pauses. Outside, the afternoon sun is low and warm. Distantly, there’s the sound of traffic and students giving one another tearful, melodramatic farewells. “I thought it would be helpful.” It’s a weak finish, and Aizawa doubts even Todoroki himself buys it. He doesn’t, if Aizawa is to judge by the brief irritation that flickers across his features.
“Right. Well, it…” A brief struggle between Aizawa’s far too soft heart and his far harder mind ensues. His heart, weakened by a hopelessly crafted and comically huge farewell card from his third year students, wins out. “It was very helpful. But you can go now. I’m sure your family are eager to see you.”
The fact that Todoroki stiffens like he’s been stung by an insect when Aizawa says the word “family” is the kind of detail that a civilian may never have noticed. Aizawa, however, has spent over twenty years without the luxury of being able to miss subtle details, and as the single responsible guardian for twenty teenagers with a death wish, his already sharp instincts are sharpest when he’s at work. He doesn’t frown, because he doesn’t know whether he wants Todoroki to know that he noticed. Instead he shifts his weight from one foot to the other, studiously casual. “Are they not here yet?” It’s the most likely cause of hurt, and it’s the first thing he needs to cross off his list.
Todoroki frowns, glancing out of the window apparently despite himself as he slips a hand into his pocket. “Uh, no. I mean, my sister’s here.”
That’s a possible explanation, at least. “Not your father, then?”
It feels like a cheap shot to say that Todoroki freezes over, but Aizawa can’t think of a better way to describe the manner in which one of his best students grows still and cold. “No.”
Aizawa thinks there could be plenty of reasons for a teenager to be angry with his father, especially a father who was absent on the last day of term to pick him up from boarding school. He also thinks that he’s missing something. “The life of a hero is a busy one, and demanding. I’m sure he would be here if he could.”
Todoroki laughs. It’s brief, and sharp, and mirthless, but it’s so rude that Aizawa finds himself momentarily lost for words. “Yeah. I’m sure.” He clears his throat, and starts walking towards Aizawa and the door. The walls of his expression come back down and his features smooth into the same bored, calm exterior he usually presents to the world. “Sorry, sir. I should go. My sister is waiting.” Todoroki is about halfway across the classroom when he stops. One of his hands is flat beside him, palm down in a stopping gesture at the floor. He looks up at Aizawa, and a little of his facade peels back to reveal the faintest hint of desperation. The unease that has started to roll in Aizawa’s gut triples in strength, making its way to a fully fledged bad feeling. “Unless there’s anything else that I could help with? At all?”
Aizawa thinks about that. He thinks about the way that Todoroki has never, not even once, taken a trip home. UA had arranged for them of course: brief, discreet, well protected visits for students who got homesick. Almost every one of his students had taken one by now, even Midoriya Izuku and Iida Tenya, both of whom worked themselves far too hard as it was. Aizawa thinks about the way he’s heard Todoroki Enji talk about his son – or more specifically the way he hasn’t heard him talk about him. He thinks about how Enji only ever talks about Shouto as a hero, and a prodigy, and his successor, but never as a teenager or a child. He thinks about everything he knows about the world.
Then he shrugs his shoulders and moves away from the wall with a deep sigh. “You can help me put the desks and chairs back, for a start. But you should let your sister know you’re going to be late.”
“She’ll understand.” Todoroki’s relief is palpable, and his phone is already in hand. Whilst he texts, Aizawa finds himself thinking about summer classes despite himself.
He doesn’t know if this…Thing is a real problem, yet. He doesn’t know if it’s any of his business. But it’s a suspicion, and it’s a start, and for now Todoroki seems much happier than he had been five minutes ago. Aizawa will count that as a victory. At least for now.

Spanking does more harm than good
Research on Spanking: It’s Bad for ALL Kids
10 Reasons Not to Hit Your Child
Reduced Prefrontal Cortical Gray Matter Volume in Young Adults Exposed to Harsh Corporal Punishment
Mothers’ Spanking of 3-Year-Old Children and Subsequent Risk of Children’s Aggressive Behavior
Physical Punishment and Mental Disorders: Results From a Nationally Representative US Sample
Spanking and Child Development Across the First Decade of Life
Ten (more) Reasons Not to Hit Your Kids
Seriously, Don’t Spank Your Kids
Why parents should never spank children
PLEASE DON’T SPANK YOUR CHILDREN AND WHAT TO DO INSTEAD
Don’t spank your children. Do these 5 things instead.
Don’t reply to this trying to justify hitting children. You will be told to read the links provided and nothing more.
Ok right I’m sorry no.
Among all the things that are INFURIATING ABOUT THIS CHAPTER. Todoroki Enji has physically abused his partner and children to the point of complete mental breakdown.
That’s not a question of whether he’s ‘proud’ of them. That’s causing real, lasting physical and psychological damage.
He hasn’t apologised. We have no evidence that he’s changed his behaviour. He’s had one, one-sided conversation. Now he’s skipping right to the good bits – the ego stroking part where he deigns to tell his son he’s proud of him, and expects him to be grateful. The part where he tells his son he’s planning to change and expects Shouto to care and be impressed.
This whole thing is STILL all about Enji. He doesn’t care about making amends for the past; or ASKING SHOUTO what HE wants, what HE needs. No; instead Enji has identified the thing that will make HIM feel better, decided how best his relationship with Shouto can be used to achieve that, and chosen to do it.
To be very clear – this is NOT a redemption arc. Shouto has NO reason to feel safe with his father, or to forgive him. I know Horikoshi is trying to write it that way (and that sucks) but just to be clear: this is classic abusive behaviour. The abuser feels guilty or like they’ve been in the wrong, and they try to shift or skip the blame and learning part, and move into something that makes them feel better. The relationship is still defined by how they feel, not empathy or sympathy with their victim.
They manipulate their victim into thinking they’ve changed in a way that makes the victim do all the emotional labour while the abuser learns very little and changes even less. Enji has just thrown the ball into Shouto’s court and implied that he should be the ‘bigger person’ by recognising Enji’s efforts to change. FUCK THAT. Enji has done nothing to redeem himself. Shouto has EVERY RIGHT to be angry.
Enji has not earned his forgiveness in any respect, and it is NOT Shouto’s job to find that forgiveness for his father and give it to him, while Enji continues to do exactly what he wants to be doing (being a hero) exactly the way he wants to do it.
If you’re an abuser and you want to change, you know the first thing you do? You give people space. You learn to listen to them. You work at THEIR pace, NOT yours. You recognise that their feelings are as important as yours – if not more important. Why? Because they have been suffering for years – and in all that time how you feel – your anger, your good mood – has defined how they’ve been allowed to feel. You’ve been in control. Step one? Give it back. Ask them what you need to do. Don’t TELL THEM WHAT THEY NEED FROM YOU. Ask them. Back up. Listen to them.
And let’s be very clear: if you’ve been physically beating your child since he was 5, it is NOT YOUR TURN to get sympathy and empathy. Enji does NOT deserve Shouto’s pride, and it’s possible he never will. Certainly not before he makes some fucking amends.
fun fact: literally every time i encounter a new health/counselling/therapy service and i get a call or assessment appointment, i get asked whether i’ve considered taking my parents to court. i got asked that on friday. it’s…it’s just really weird
i’ve had clinical depression for 9 years. when new places ask about it i have to go into history, and because my depression and anxiety can be connected to my upbringing, that ends up coming up. then i get all the questions about the abuse: are you safe, are your parents near children, what happened exactly etc etc
like this phone call? hard 30 min limit. just supposed to diagnose mental health. but halfway through we’re talking about the abuse stuff and she’s like ‘listen, i have to ask, have you considered taking your parents to court’
and here’s the thing. i love my friends, dearly. none of my close friends live in the same city as me. i can’t very well go messaging them out of the blue with this crap. it’s stressful enough for me and i’m used to it. and i can’t tell people i know in this city because i just don’t know them well enough.
so i just walk around feeling like…like i have this big secret i can’t tell people. a serious, important secret. and it’s so weird and i hate it and yeah. i don’t know it just knocks me off balance